The Dead Man's Lament
by PixelButterfly
Summary: Dying, Wang Yo thinks back to happier days and wonders what went wrong in his life. A summary of Yo's emotions throughout the series with a twist. Wang Yo/Hwang Bo Yeon Hwa centric. A gift to BlueBooks, a reader on AO3.


**Dear Bluebooks,  
** **You left me a lovely comment on DELMGA (my other fic) on AO3 and asked for a pairing I could not give you within that story line. I was originally going to just apologize and move on, but your question sparked something in me and I was inspired to write this in the fashion that I wrote ATMHF. As a thank you for inspiring me and as a gift from a humble author to her lovely reader, I give you this one-shot in hopes that you will begin writing for the Moon Lovers fandom and add your creativity to the family. I look forward to reading what you have to offer.  
** **Regards,** **PixelButterfly**

* * *

Lying on the cold floor, his heart pounding with the beat of a million drums, Yo felt his thoughts drifting as he felt a warm pair of arms wrap around him. Was Death warm? The Grim Reaper, was he coming now? What would they tell his darling Yeon Hwa, the one he had held so dear to his heart and bared his soul to. Would they tell her he died a man, or would they say he choked on his own vomit, convulsing on the floor like a man possessed?

* * *

As children, he had spied her from afar. Being five years older than Hwang Bo Yeon Hwa, Wang Yo had not noticed his sister until she was fourteen and her scrawny little form weighed down by royal hanboks was replaced by a tall girl with breasts and long hair that fell to her waist.

Yo had enjoyed playing sports with his many brothers. Though a few had been too young to play when he was of the age to enjoy kicking a ball around, a few were close enough that he could be rough with them. As the third son of Taejo Wang Geon, Wang Yo had never wanted anything and he had never been jealous of anything except for Mu's position as heir. But when Yo had pushed Wook down for cheating in a ball game, little Yeon Hwa had scrambled to her older brother's side to wipe his eyes and press a kiss to his injured knee. Yo wondered why she had never done that for him.

He watched as she grew into a magnificent lady and bloomed into the court's most elegant flower. Black hair that shone like fresh ink and lips that were doused in the sun's warmth graced her features. Hanboks no longer looked bulky on her because they now fit her graceful silhouette and frame. Her looks were praised from dawn till dusk and every lordling around demanded their fathers arrange their marriage. Wang Yo had thrown a table when the first offers arrived after Yeon Hwa's introduction to court.

And so, he had taken matters into his own hands, wooing his little sister and bringing her little gifts. He had given her attention he had never lavished onto his brothers, and when she had expressed interest in his mutilated brother, So, Yo had gone into a rage and kicked his brother down, demanding to know by what right a beast like him dared to even breathe the same air as her.

It had been easy to lure the most beautiful flower into his trap. Yo remembered how he had stolen her first kiss, though she had not been his first. Hidden from their servants in the annals of the Emperor's personal library, he had cupped her cheek and kissed her, teaching her how to use her tongue and teeth, swallowing every little gasp and mewl she had emitted. But Yeon Hwa was ambitious- not submissive- and it was that fire that had made her lash back and kiss him even harder.

Though she had not been his first kiss, they had been each other's firsts. After his engagement to Mun Gong of the Park clan, Yeon Hwa had come into his chambers in the dead of night and together, they had made each other feel whole. Their first time had been a messy instance of teenagers fumbling to touch each other in the dark, but the times afterward had brought pleasure and felt right.

Yeon Hwa had worn her most splendid robes to both of Yo's weddings. And each time, he found that she was the most beautiful woman in the hall. On his wedding night, after completing the deed with his simpering wife, Yo had decided to go looking for Yeon Hwa, but was refused solace in her arms.

And then, So had returned. Yo had assumed Yeon Hwa felt as if he had abandoned her, and watching her trying to woo his younger brother had ignited a fire in his chest. So he had acted quickly, procuring a gold and ruby ring wrought around a band of jade and opal. The ring, he presented to Yeon Hwa with the choice of being his Queen or being the Wolf Dog's bitch.

But, it seemed the gods had different plans and instead of allowing Yo to just marry the woman he yearned for, they gave him his first child and then killed him by the Wolf Dog's hand.

As he had fallen from the cliff, he had looked at Wook and seen Yeon Hwa in his younger brother's eyes. In that moment, he was jealous again. Jealous that Wook would live to see another day in the same world as Yeon Hwa. Staring past the Wolf Dog, Yo had met eyes with Wook and gazed into the dark orbs that matched his sister's. They were beautiful.

Cruel as the gods were, Yo had realized that they were a sadistically merciful lot when he had woken up a week later in his uncle's home. His organs were no longer spilling from his sliced gut and the gash above his heart had been stitched and mended.

It had taken months for him to heal and years for him to recover. Wang Yo's pride was brutally beaten down in those months, when he had been unable to digest solid foods, throwing up on himself and then enduring the tearing agony that followed when the stitches in his stomach protested against his upheaval. Even still, he had endured. He had endured each gruelling day of infection, fever, sickness, and hatred the gods had poured down upon his weakened body.

Remembering his Yeon Hwa, he had striven to mend his body and grow strong once more. A year of treatment and he was able to stand on his own again, walking and running. He could ride a horse and shoot a bow by the next half year, and when the second year drew to a close, Yo was able to wield a sword again.

By that time, he found himself seated on his father's throne, labelled a kinslayer, but also called Emperor. He had prevailed, but he was no longer a prince. Yo knew that his seat would constantly be challenged by those around him- especially the beast he called 'brother'.

His son by his second wife had yet to do much but toddle around and say words like "tree" or "hand." An heir would not come out of that one, but Yo had time. What he needed were allies that would protect him if the likes of Wook or the Wolf Dog decided to take his throne.

With a heavy heart, he had met with Yeon Hwa in the throne room, noticing the ring he had given her glittering on her fourth finger. She had chosen to be his. She had chosen to be his and he was sending her away.

Of course, his Yeon Hwa had managed to escape the clutches of her marriage in Khitan. Never insipid, she had aided him, so Yo had kept her by his side, relieved that he had a reason to do so. But she had never sought him out and he had not the heart to call her to his side to warm his bed and lay beside him.

Something had slipped, then. As the way Yeon Hwa looked at him changed, something in Yo had broken. Perhaps it was the regicide and the fratricide that had culminated to devour his mind and soul whole. Perhaps it was the rejection of his first and only love. Perhaps it was the loneliness that ate at his heart and gnawed at his bones. Either way, Jeongjong, Emperor of Goryeo broke inside, and dedicated himself to worship, trying to appease Buddha and absolve himself of sin.

And then, the Wolf Dog and his traitorous lapdog, Baek Ah, had brought an army into Songak. Yo had been caught unaware and he had only So's Damiwon bitch to be by his side as his mind continued to dangle off the ledge of sanity.

Who had opened the doors to them, he had no idea, but Yo wished his Yeon Hwa was by his side to kiss him goodnight like they had when they were children. His head filled with the clamor of bells and the roar of the sea as he wrote out an abdication. Who should he give the throne to? To whom should he gift endless agony, loneliness, and grief? Yeon Hwa? Perhaps she would like to be Empress, but he could not resign her to such a fate. He loved her too much to hurt her in that way. Perhaps he should give it to the Wolf Dog as a joke. Yo was not one to be funny, but he thought it was funny the way So's Damiwon girl- Hae Soo- had quaked with fear when he had grasped her and asked her who he should write his abdication to.

* * *

His heart stuttered and Yo looked up at Hae Soo and So, as they stood by him. He knew that this time, he would not return from the dead. In his heart he knew so, and in his heart, he wished he could see Yeon Hwa a final time, but the only ones to watch him go were a girl whose eyes were too big and the man Yo had tormented his whole life.

A tear slipped from his eye as the deafening sound of brass bells grew silent in his mind. Wang Yo wished his Yeon Hwa was there to see him off. He wished he could apologize to her for his misdeeds and for the agony he must have caused her in his selfishness.

He wished he could say good-bye.


End file.
